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THE SPOILED UNDER-30 CROWD!!!

May 22nd 2009 14:44
If you are 30 or older you will think this is hilarious!!!!

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking Twenty-five miles to school every morning....

Uphill... Barefoot...

BOTH ways

Yadda, yadda, yadda

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on my kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!

But now that... I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today.


You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!

And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don't know how good you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!!

There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter - with a pen!

Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in the mailbox and it would take, like, a week to get there! Stamps were 10 cents!

Child Protective Services didn't care if our parents beat us. As a matter of fact, the parents of all my friends also had permission to kick our ass! Nowhere was safe!

There were no MP3' s or Napsters! If you wanted to steal music, you had to hitchhike to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself!

Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! There were no CD players! We had tape decks in our car We'd play our favorite tape and "eject" it when finished and the tape would come undone. Cause - that's how we rolled, dig?


We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it!

And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either!
When the phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'. Your guy was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen... Forever!
And you could never win.. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!


You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel! NO REMOTES!!!

There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards!

And we didn't have microwaves, if we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove! Imagine that!

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy. You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back in 1980 or before!

Regards,
The Over 30 Crowd

I got this in an email and just had to share it. Im under 30 and thought it was funny.

Enjoy
27
Vote
   


Pastors Ass

April 25th 2009 14:26
The
Pastor's Ass


The pastor entered his donkey in a race and
it won.
The pastor was so pleased with the donkey
that he entered it in the
race
again, and it won again.

The local paper read:

PASTOR'S ASS OUT FRONT.

The Bishop was so upset with this kind of
publicity that he ordered
the
pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.

The next day, the local paper headline
read:
BISHOP
SCRATCHES
PASTOR'S
ASS.

This was too much for the bishop, so he
ordered the pastor to get
rid
of the donkey.

The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a
nearby convent.

The local paper, hearing of the news, posted
the following headline
the
next day:

NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN.

The bishop fainted.

He informed the nun that she would have to
get rid of the donkey, so
she
sold it to a farmer for $10.


The next day the paper read:

NUN
SELLS ASS FOR $10.

This was too much for the bishop, so he
ordered the nun to buy back
the
donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run
wild.


The next day the headlines
read:


NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE.

The bishop was buried the next day.


The moral of the story is . . .
.... being concerned about public opinion
can bring you much grief and misery . ... even shorten your life.


So be yourself and enjoy life.


Stop worrying about everyone else's ass and
you'll be a lot happier
and
live longer!

Have
a nice day!
27
Vote
   


Great Joke

April 23rd 2009 20:24
Do NOT lose your Grand kids in the Mall

My grandson got away from me Sunday at the mall. He
approached a uniformed policeman and said, "I've lost my grandpa!"

The cop asked, "What's he like?"

The little boy hesitated for a moment and then replied,


"Jack Daniels and women with big tits."
38
Vote
   


Hey Im Here

April 22nd 2009 00:03
Hey I am the new owner of the Jokes Nut I will start posting today and cant wait make shure to come back on a regular baisis as i will e updating often.
37
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Quotes & Jokes - Thursday 28th August

August 28th 2008 06:04
TODAYS QUOTE
"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams"


[ Click here to read more ]
75
Vote
   


Quotes & Jokes - Tuesday 26th August

August 26th 2008 06:04
TODAYS QUOTE
"Today is not finished until tomorrow commences"


[ Click here to read more ]
75
Vote
   


Quotes & Jokes - Monday 25th August

August 25th 2008 05:58
TODAYS QUOTE
"Everyone must row with the oars he has"


[ Click here to read more ]
76
Vote
   


Quotes & Jokes - Friday 22nd August

August 22nd 2008 05:51
TODAYS QUOTE
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out"


[ Click here to read more ]
82
Vote
   


Quotes & Jokes - Thursday 21st August

August 21st 2008 05:46
TODAYS QUOTE
"If you're going through hell - keep going"


[ Click here to read more ]
100
Vote
   


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