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Bad Pick Up Lines

July 22nd 2009 17:26
FW: Bad Pick Up Lines
Here is a list of pickup lines I used in the last couple of years that didn’t work can you tell me why.
1) Did you fart? Cuz you blew me away. [Within this moment, I would've cut one and see what he says then]

2) Are yer parents retarded? Cuz ya sure are special. [Well, he must be Jerry's Kids special]

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea. I can't hold it
in. [Really? Coincidentally I can't hold the vomit in my mouth any longer either.]

4) Do you have a library card? Cuz I'd like to sign
you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants? Cuz I can see

myself in 'em. [I see you're using the Larry Craig method, eh]

6) If you was a tree I were a Squirrel, I'd store my
nuts in yer hole. [WTF?!]

7) You might not be the best lookin' girl here, but
beauty's only a light switch away. [Don't be burning bridges before you cross them.]

8) Man: "Fat Penguin!" Woman: "WHAT?" Man: "I just
wanted to say something that would break the ice." [Lame]

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can
make yer bed-rock. [Very Lame]

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I
think he went inta this cheap motel room. [Sadly, this is the same tactic that pedophiles use to kidnap children. So, try not to fall for this one, just run away.]

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin', we kin
sleep 'til afternoon. [What the hell is this?! According to the spelling, he must have an Arkansas accent.]

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench. Every time I
think of it, my nuts tighten up. [Eww!]


There are lots of stupid and desperate people out there, so be careful.


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Comments
2 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Emanna

August 8th 2009 02:44
Do you work for UPS? Because I coulda swore i saw you checking out my package...

Comment by Emanna

August 8th 2009 02:45
Do you work for UPS? Because I coulda swore i saw you checking out my package...

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